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Wedding Day: Order of Events |
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Where We are Taking Yesterday's Traditions |
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Wedding Symbolism |
Wedding ceremonies and receptions are steeped in tradition. We embrace many customs, but as the years go by couples alter traditions to fit their needs and changing times. Ultimately, if you want to get married on the beach, barefoot, and wearing a sarong and then head to a reggae style reception - go for it. It's your day.
For those a bit more traditional at heart, we've outlined some of the customs we see couples modernizing.
Tradition: In the early 1900's the bride's attendants were always unmarried females.
Trend: We threw out the "had to be married" part a long time ago. Recently, some brides are choosing their best male friend to stand up in the maid of honor spot. The same goes for the groom choosing a woman to stand in as the "best man."
Tradition: Rice, a symbol of fertility, is tossed at the couple as they leave the wedding or reception.
Trend: Turns out rice is bad for landscaping and birds like to munch on it to their detriment. Recently, couples are opting to give their guests bird seed, rose petals, bubble blowing wands and even an occasional boxed butterfly to be released when the couple exits.
Tradition: The honeymoon is the new couples' chance to go on their first vacation, have sex for the first time and is really their first chance to truly be alone.
Trend: Even if the couple didn't live together before they got married, the odds that this is their first vacation together or that they have never been intimate are low. Today, many second marriages include children from the first go around in the honeymoon. Another trend is for couples to have their wedding ceremony at the same location where they will spend their honeymoon.
Tradition: A classic band is hired to play at the reception. Traditional music is played at the ceremony. Mendelssohn's Wedding March became popular back in 1858 when Princess Victoria chose the song for her wedding to Prince Frederick of Prussia.
Trend: Couples are opting for a DJ at the reception with a wide repertoire of modern music. For the ceremony, couples are choosing more varied musical selections, including popular and classical pieces.
Tradition: Ahhh the x-rated bachelor party. Back in the fifth century, Spartan warriors offered toasts to soon-to-be-husbands. The same toast was given to salute comrades who died in battle.
Trend: The bachelor party has evolved into a special outing with good friends. Not to say that x-rated nights don't still occur, but they less commonly occur the night before the wedding and are more toned down.
Tradition: Mom and dad of the bride are the main sponsors of the wedding.
Trend: Today, weddings are more expensive and couples are getting married later in life. It is not uncommon for expenses to be shared between the parents of the bride, the parents of the groom and the couple themselves, depending on everyone's ability to contribute.
Tradition: Wedding pictures stick to the formal, tried-and-true format.
Trend: Couples still want some traditional pictures, but in addition to more candid, expressive photography. A few black and white or sepia shots can be added for artistic variety. Disposable cameras left on reception tables give guests the chance to record their perspective.
Tradition: The minister or public official prepares the vows.
Trend: Today, couples are more likely to write their own simple vows or modify and approve the vows their officiant will be saying. The "obey" portion of the bride's pledge to "love, honor and obey" has gone the way of pastel tuxedos.
Tradition: The bride wears a white dress. Contrary to urban legend, white does not represent the bride's virginity. Until the mid19th century, white wasn't even a popular choice for wedding gowns. Then, in 1840 Queen Victoria of England wore an all-white ensemble for her wedding to Prince Albert and created a vogue that has become an institution.
Trend: White is still the vogue for the bride, but we also see ivory, as well as pastel accents on dresses.
Tradition: The father of the bride gives his daughter away at the ceremony. Marriage was considered a property transaction and the daughter was an item used to secure a better status for the family.
Trend: Today the escort down the aisle varies. Brides choose between their mom, dad, step dad, grandpa, brother or any combination that suits their family structure.
Sources include:
www.weddingchannel.com
"The New Traditions" by Jennifer Evans Gardner
"From the Red Carpet" by Ellie Bowman
Premier Bride, "Traditions From Yesteryear to Now" by Cherie Ronning
The Best Wedding Ever by Diane Warner
The Dallas Morning News 1998, "The Wedding Traditions" by Leslie Garcia